The Group Wherein CRAZY Spice Self Destructs

This morning, due to the entire clientele save CRAZY Spice wanting to cause CRAZY Spice bodily harm, things were somewhat tense. After a chat with ASSKICKS Spice, however, I had opted not to bring up any of the multiple issues with CRAZY in the group setting. As such, I settled for simply addressing the issue of people leaving coffee cups about the house and not pushing their chairs in when they get up from the table.

This led to FRIEND Spice having a few words to say about herself, which due to confidentiality, I can not really discuss here, but suffice it to say she addressed a personal issue and was speaking from the point of view of letting the group know, if this issue comes up, it is her issue, and not to take it personally. At this point, our other new girl, Brainy Rail Aquired Total-directness Spice or BRAT Spice, for short, attempted to clarify what FRIEND Spice was talking about for the benefit of the group.

CRAZY proceeded to get up and head out of the room to use the washroom. Upon her return, she had to visit the water cooler in order to refill her cup. FRIEND Spice addressed the fact that she found CRAZY getting up and wandering during group very disrespectful, particularly when one was sharing something important to them. CRAZY huffed and puffed and blew her brains down by saying “I have permission, thank you very much.” AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

Needless to say, she did not receive a “you’re welcome.”

Upon returning to the group, BRAT began attempting to clarify the issue once again, however, by this point, CRAZY had a pen and paper out and was quickly jotting down each and every word that came out of anyone’s mouth. BRAT made a comment about it being pointless to attempt to discuss something when someone is writing instead of participating in the discussion. CRAZY then informed us that she felt attacked and threatened, because it was clear to her that everything we said was all about her…even though it was not.

CRAZY then went on to say she was not going to share unless a staff member was present as she felt unsafe and threatened (2nd time saying almost precisely the same thing, I’m assuming because none of us patted her on the head and cooed “Poor CRAZY…” the first time, which she assumed must have been because we just couldn’t properly hear her…) and that was all there was to it. Caring Attentive Listener Marvelous Spice, or CALM Spice, for short, attempted to ask CRAZY why she felt unsafe and threatened, only to be snapped at  with “I’m not going to talk about this now, I already told you I’m not getting into it without a staff member present.” At which point the pen and paper reappeared, and CRAZY continued to fervently record every word we spoke. Now, I’m sorry, but I do not believe that writing down the things I share privately about myself in group is, in any way, acceptable, a concern I then expressed to staff.

This whole occurance, by the way, was on the heels of my, at the beginning of group, requesting that the flourescent lights, which were hurting AWESOME and I’s eyeballs, off for the duration of group. CRAZY then said no, because she needed the light, wherein it was gently pointed out to CRAZY that she was sitting not a foot away from a lamp, which was in the “on” position, and thus throwing light. Clearly frustrated that she was no longer given the power to burn all of our retina’s straight out of our heads, CRAZY started to object with “So I’m going to have to lean over like this” (Demonstrates a lean of all of three centimetres) “to see?” and, upon discovering no one had sympathy for her three centimetre lean plight, ended with “Fine. I’m willing to do that for my recovery…” Implying, quite clearly, that we should all be willing to have our retina’s deep fried for our recoveries.

Staff did talk to CRAZY after group, and I’m hoping ASSKICKS Spice was able to give CRAZY the much needed dose of “SHUT THE FUCK UP AND PUT YOUR BIG GIRL PANTIES ON” required at this time.

Just now, as BRAT and CRAZY were looking for games of some kind, they were discussing words that began with “F” suitable for valentines day. Instantly, I offered my, I think, very valid and reasonable suggestion of “Fuck me harder.” CRAZY, however, failed to see the rationale, and instead ran to ASSKICKS and promptly tattled. I think I may have to take her to the taxidermist and have her stuffed, as it’s beginning to come clear to me that this may well be the only way she will ever find a place within our group that isn’t “Client we ALL want to Kill.”

God help me, I can’t stand that woman.

AWESOME….balcony throwing time, babe…hop to!!

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~ by double2dee on February 6, 2009.

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